Dramarama

We all have it in our lives.  Drama exists, whether we like it or not.  I have what I like to call “crazy makers” in my life.  If there isn’t drama, they will find a way to make some.  For me,  one of the keys to finding some inner peace has been to avoid the crazy makers, and minimize the drama whenever possible.  Easier said than done.  It can be hard sometimes to ignore and hold the tongue.  Sometimes I respond and wish I had not.  Sometimes I respond and I’m glad I did.   I think what I learned yesterday was that the key to response is simply to identify whether or not it is actually drama, and is it worth responding to?

My 13-year-old has no lack of teenage drama in her life.  At school yesterday, a terrible rumor went around about one of her classmates.  It was serious for their age group, and when I picked her up, she claimed she was exhausted (please use a 13-year-old tone of voice here) from the drama at school today.  The hair on my neck immediately stood straight up, and felt my heart racing and that gut feeling like I was going to need to rush to her defense in some way.  As she unfolded the story, turned out it had nothing to do with her, she was simply questioned once and because thankfully she was not a part of it, was left to watch others sort it out and get in trouble.

Naturally, my next question was “Why so exhausting if you weren’t involved?”   She thought it was so much “drama” to spend so much time questioning everyone and dealing with all of it.  I let her know if the rumor was about her, I would have wanted the school to spend just as much time and energy getting to the bottom of it.  She agreed, and then explained what was truly so “exhausting”.  In the process of the way people reacted, she learned that the friend she thought was such a good friend, was not a nice person.  She also learned that the girl she thought was mean and fake was the most caring and concerned person throughout the entire day.  She decided it was time to back away from the girl who showed her true colors, and said she walked up right up to the girl she had mentally labeled as “mean” and told her she was sorry if she hadn’t given her a bigger chance at being friends and hoped they could be friends.  That girl told her to stop talking, hugged her, and said that would be great!

It was then I had one of those big AH HA moments.  Really?  Did she just learn this lesson on her own?  She sure did.   Then she said to me, “Mom, you know what’s good about this?”  Tears running down the inside of my sunglasses, “What is good about it babe?”  She said, “I’m really tired, and that was a lot of drama for one day.  But I think because we had this one day of major drama…it will eliminate a whole bunch down the line.”

Genius.

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2 Comments

  1. September 25, 2010 at 11:23 am

    Oh wow. And I thoughtmy 10 year old was giving me drama! She gets it naturally though. Im a huge drama queen

  2. samayazmom said,

    September 27, 2010 at 4:29 pm

    oh Heather it hasn’t even started yet…5th grade it heats up!!! And I will say, it did stick. She had a great day today!


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